God's "Completely Fraudulent" Friend

Nancy Pelosi's daughter, Alexandra Pelosi, has produced a film, Friends of God which follows the world of the evangelical movement. I don't get HBO, but I've heard about the film, and from the New York Times review:

"You know all the surveys say that evangelicals have the best sex life of any other group," Mr. Haggard waggishly told a documentary filmmaker a few months before his secret came out. On "Friends of God: A Road Trip With Alexandra Pelosi," which will be shown tonight on HBO, Mr. Haggard coaxes a member of his congregation to say how often he has sex with his wife ("Every day. Twice a day.") and how often she climaxes ("Every time").

You could almost see the wrathful lightning bolt striking down from the heavens.

No kidding. Shakespeare's "Me thinks thou dost protest too much" contains a world of wisdom on the human condition. Happily satisfied men with satisfied lovers feel no compulsion to discuss it. The documentary was filmed before Haggard's three year homosexual love affair with former male escort Mike Jones was exposed.

Well, other than the betrayal of his wife and the fact that he goes around the country condemning people for behavior he himself practices, who cares? I don't care if the man is intimate with cows.

I posted here in reference to the Foley fiasco about an inverse relationship between self-righteousness and actual behavior.

Well, unfortunately, instead of coming clean and establishing integrity with the world, the man has chosen the dark side. Unlike some, he and apparently the folks around him, lack the intellect to see what is blatantly obvious to just about all of the rest of us. In The Denver Post we are now being told that Haggard is "completely heterosexual."

What?

For language efficiency, please permit me two acronyms:

CHET: A man who actually is "completely heterosexual"
GSA: Gay sexual activity between two men

Yea, I know, not that simple, but close enough for purposes here.

Some obvious observations about CHET's. First of all, CHET's do not consider GSA as something to do. They do not "wonder about it" as an option to actually consider. For a CHET to wake up one morning and say, "I might engage in GSA one of these days" is no less ridiculous than arising and saying, "Hmmm, maybe I'll hold a torch to my left eye and boil the vitriolic fluid until it explodes."

In fact, CHET's find the idea of engaging in GSA so unappealing that approaching them and seriously suggesting it is inherently dangerous and should not be considered intelligent behavior.

Sparing the reader any lengthy psychological presentation, let's just say that there are stages involved with significant acts. Is it interesting? Does one desire it? Is it compelling? Is it possible? Is it just fun in fantasy or does it warrant real action? Where are opportunities? How to make it happen? Start talking about it in the right circles. One has to progress through all of these, and there has to be sufficient energy for it to progress.

How far down the path do you go when considering exploding your left eye with a blowtorch?

The fact is that you never even considered considering this. WHICH IS EXACTLY MY POINT!! A CHET never even considers considering it.

Haggard went through all of the stages and then fully engaged in the behavior for several years. He would not have done it if it did not appeal to him. He is lying to everyone, and perhaps even himself. It is not black and white. There is a spectrum, and Haggard is no where near the territory where "completely heterosexual" would make sense. I have no clue (nor care) if the guy is attracted to women, but there is no question he is attracted to men.

He is lying.