Reviews, Reality, and Radar

Tucson, Arizona. Readership and feedback regarding Something Else has grown. Per emails private and comments posted for all to see, reviews have consistency. I respect every remark provided, from the simple correction of a name spelling to Liza’s penetrating analysis that uncovers much. The rabbit hole goes deeper still. Word on the street has become the darkest ever for the future of Tucson’s customized training institute. Contact SAIAT directly (google) for the facts, but the scoop points to closure.

Regarding the reviews and commentary, the key feedback sums to the following:

Tighten the material involving Giffords (severe reduction), politics (moderate reduction), and family (modest reduction) while fortifying economic development rigor and heavily strengthening the workforce development and education content. Chapters 12 and 14 receive glowing remarks.

Before I get to reality and radar, Liza’s analysis warrants publication:

I see this story on three levels. The main story is, in my opinion, a powerful indictment of the local “economic development” community. The story is focused on SAIAT, but x4mr provides a tremendous amount of insight into what is behind the overall dismal performance of that community. This alone is a good story. It’s the kind of story that Frank Rich of the NYT could nail in about four or five op-eds without missing a thing.

However, x4mr’s underlying, autobiographical story is equally important to this narrative. He transitions his career from engineering to workforce development because of a major life event, losing his job as well as witnessing the meltdown of a company that employed thousands of people. While dealing with his own situation, he begins the transition that is driven by his belief that, with just a small investment from the community, many people can achieve far more than they do. His vision and commitment take him as far as the CEO position at SAIAT, where he continues to prove that small investments in training yield large returns. He creates an organization that, because of its flexibility, focus, and resources is able to support a wide range of training needs within the local community. Rather than expand this model, the local “economic development” experts decide to starve it and, aided by a couple of arrogant and malicious individuals with their own agenda, force x4mr out of the organization. The underlying story is one of personal anguish and self reflection.

Superimposed on the two stories is the ever present message of hope as evidenced by, first of all, writing the story. Clearly, x4mr hopes that by writing this story, it will enlighten and perhaps become an agent of change. Throughout the narrative, his testimony gives the reader insight into what is possible when visionary leadership, commitment, and resources converge. X4mr’s mission is to affect the future, not to vent the past.

So, having read the other early feedback, I mostly agree with what has been said. The family related digressions assist the autobiographical component of the story. In other words, X4mr has to develop his own character. Most people would pick and choose pretty carefully here, and I think that x4mr has done a good job in that respect. The digressions also provide relief from the sad story that is unfolding.

I agree with “the Doctor” and I would recommend losing Giffords in her entirety. She is simply not relevant. Perhaps, x4mr, at some later time you can be her biographer. I also agree with “the Doctor” that the political content should be trimmed down considerably. I would suggest treating the CD8 election as your introduction to the blogosphere, allow it to be an enjoyable digression, capture a couple of highlights that interest or amuse you and end it. Remember, this is about YOU.

I mentioned earlier that some of the characters who are central to the story might need to be fleshed out. As a reader, I am having some trouble retaining a mental reference for these people, and they have become interchangeable “cementheads.” I would not hesitate to include some physical descriptions or even unrelated stories about them that support character development. Not a lot, just enough to distinguish one from the other. Kathryn is an example of a fleshed out character.

Unlike Sirocco, I was not bothered by any of the repetition of financial information or other redundancies. Well placed redundancies can help a reader stay on track or even absorb something important that was missed earlier. It’s especially helpful if the material is being read over a period of time as opposed to one sitting.

And, finally, chapter 12 is awesome.

Liza’s remarks are so good in parts they moisten my eyes, but there is more to the story. For now, I will state that Something Else is about REALITY, the truth going on underneath all the bullshit. We have the reality of Iraq, and the BS about Iraq, the reality of health care and the BS about healthcare, the reality of education and the BS about education, the reality of drugs and the BS. The list goes on. When reading the document, pay attention to every time the word "real" is used.

In addition to reality we have the radar that provides our awareness of reality. The blogosphere is as real as your house. How long did I blog under the radar of those involved in the story? When I ran a story about x4mr technology, its inventor emailed me and posted a comment within hours. He is plugged in.

As anticipated, Something Else punched through the barrier between cyberspace and the street. Some of the characters in the document have discovered it, leading them here. Of course you had to find your own way.

Welcome to a bigger reality.

At the risk of stating the obvious, you do realize this is Web 2.0. Future events can be published here and integrated into the document.